I Hope You Realize Your Worth

Recently I posted about humility, and I said that humility is not thinking too low about yourself. I decided to pontificate on that because it is something that I struggle with, and something that I think a lot of people can relate to.

My problem tends to be that I tell myself I'm never good enough. I have so many problems and I obsess over them, so I feel unworthy of anyone else's affection, as if other people know about my personal struggles and are judging me for them. My brain tells me that they aren't, but deep inside, I just know they are. No one else has told me that I'm not good enough or done anything to make me feel that way - I just have high standards of myself, and I fall short constantly. I feel like I have to prove myself on a daily basis: to myself, to everyone else, and to Jesus.

Let me be clear on one thing: no one is good enough on our own. God hates sin, and everyone has committed sin. God desires perfection, and our good deeds will never erase our sin. We are nothing without Christ. But with Christ, what hope we have! "Not that we are sufficient in ourselves to claim anything as coming from us, but our sufficiency is from God" (2 Corinthians 3:5). 

Well, I was listening to a radio sermon the other day that was talking about this very thing. The guy speaking - I don't know who it was - was talking about how Satan accuses people of their sins, over and over again. He holds it over their heads so they always think about it, and they tell themselves that their mistakes are all that defines them. This is one of Satan's most-used tricks. He lies to us and gets us to lie to ourselves.

"You'll never be good enough for anything."

"Everyone thinks you're worthless."

"You can't do this."

Peter and Jesus as portrayed by NBC's "AD: The Bible Continues"

The radio speaker was talking specifically about Peter, and how he always felt the need to prove himself to Jesus. He needed to be the best. "Oh, Lord, I will never deny you! Even though all of these others will deny you, I never will!" "I will defend my Lord and cut off this enemy's ear so that He will know that I am the most loyal!" "I'll get out of the boat first and rush to greet him!" You get the picture. Peter understood that to be a follower of Jesus, you should have that joy, that passion to serve Him. However, what Peter didn't get was that Jesus offers rest. Rest from all of those insecurities. Rest from all of the work of proving that you're better than your mistakes.

He knew about Peter's passion and his insecurities, and all of Peter's problems, and He loved him anyway. Even after Peter denied Jesus, Jesus took him back as a friend. Unlike all of the other people around me, Jesus does know about my personal struggles. And He loves me anyway.

That, more than anything else, is what I have the most trouble believing.

Romans 5:8 says, "But God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us." How could God still love me in the midst of all my problems and mistakes? Every day, when I say, "I'll do better tomorrow?", how could God still care enough about me to send his son to die?

Honestly, it's a mystery to me. But it's true. He does.

Ok, I hate answers like that myself and it pains me to have to put one of those "He just does!" on my blog. I like answers. I like them to be logical. But that's the thing about God: He's too big for any of us to understand. He's not always logical.

And get this: it doesn't matter. We don't have to understand that aspect of God. Because no matter how He does it, He does. As Skillet says in their song Imperfection, "You mean so much that heaven would touch the face of humankind for you." We were worth it to him, and we still are. And instead of falling into the devil's trap and making excuses about how we aren't worth it, we should be praising God that he saw fit to save us, and that he has given us a part in his grand plan for the world.

God made us to fulfill our part.

When He looks at you or me, He doesn't see someone who is constantly messing up. Because of our belief in Jesus, God sees someone who is trying.

As long as you are, of course. Trying, that is.

Peter made mistakes. He was human. He was fallible. But look where he ended up! People today are still talking about him! Even though he had his share of struggles, he was able to #1: get to know Jesus Christ firsthand, which in itself is incredible, and #2: become one of the most successful preachers in the days of the Early Church, and one of the boldest witnesses for the faith. Peter was the first one to preach on the day of Pentecost after the coming of the Holy Spirit, and he was the first one to proclaim Christ to a Gentile. Church tradition says (and I can't say this for fact, but) that Peter is even said to have dictated his discipleship with Jesus to John Mark, who wrote the book of Mark and was a companion of Peter's for many of the later years of his life. Even though Peter was eventually martyred, and I hope that God might not call us to give that ultimate sacrifice, the biblical evidence clearly points to the fact that those who are persecuted and suffer for their witness to Christ (up to and including death) are pleasing in God’s sight and will be honored. Though an arrogant, cocky "man of thunder", Peter was a willing, obedient servant of the Lord, even to death; and he was able to overcome his passion and replace it with a humility that led him to request that he be crucified upside down (historian Tertullian tells us) because he was unfit to be killed in the same way as our Lord.

When I think about Peter's life, it gives me hope. He overcame so much, but Jesus chose him when he was still flailing around in a fisherman's boat, not even trying to work on his flaws. And Jesus has chosen us to do his work as well.

That is an incredible thought to me.

God has made us good enough to accomplish whatever he has called us to. "For we are his workmanship, created in Christ Jesus for good works, which God prepared beforehand, that we should walk in them" (Ephesians 2:10). 

God has made us and that alone gives us worth. "For you formed my inward parts, you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you, for I am fearfully and wonderfully made. Wonderful are your works; my soul knows it very well" (Psalm 139:13-14).  

God will give us strength to get through any situation. "I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me" Philippians 4:13.


I know that these verses and the story of Peter encourages and strengthens me, and I hope they do the same for you. I hope you realize your worth in Christ Jesus.

Until next time, dear readers!

 

I Hope You Install Humility

I don't know about you, but sometimes I get frustrated with speakers when they preach on ambiguous ideas. Often, they will talk about what to do, but not how to do it. I find that they occasionally take for granted the fact that their audience knows the definition of basic "Sunday School" words. However, when knowledge of what a word means is lacking, the whole message can go up in smoke. One of these ambiguous ideas that I struggle with a lot is understanding the concept of humility. Pastors can base entire sermons on the verse Luke 14:11: "For everyone who exalts himself will be humbled, and he who humbles himself will be exalted.” That's a great verse, right? But how can you "humble yourself" if you aren't sure what the word means? If the word is even slightly misunderstood, the entire meaning of the sermon is, as well.   

What exactly is "humility"? Everyone seems to have a different idea. The word is understood as multiple ideas that have varying but significant differences. Some think that the word is an attribute of one who allows others to walk all over them, a "doormat". Some think that it means to think low of yourself, to put yourself in the lowest possible position. Some think it is simply seeing yourself for who you truly are. According to the Merriam-Webster dictionary, "humility" is "the quality or state of not thinking you are better than other people" (http://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/humility), I believe that humility is a little bit of all of that, but I think it is more. True humility has many faces, and that is why it is so difficult to clearly define.

I think that Philippians 2: 3-11 defines it best: "Do nothing from rivalry or conceit, but in humility count others more significant than yourselves. Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others. Have this mind among yourselves, which is yours in Christ Jesus, who, though he was in the form of God, did not count equality with God a thing to be grasped, but made himself nothing, taking the form of a servant, being born in the likeness of men..." Count others more significant than yourself. This means that humility is not only the way you see yourself, it is also (and perhaps more importantly) the way you view and treat others.

Jesus is the best example, of course, having given up his position as prince of heaven to come to this dirty place and follow his Father's plan to the end, knowing that all things work together for good for those who love Him (see I Hope You See Hope ). All truly great leaders have this virtue: humility, otherwise known as "leading by example". For some people it’s natural. Others need to consciously practice it. Either way, if this is an attribute that you have perfected or are working on, others will notice. They will be impressed. And they will want to follow your example.

In order to master this view of others, one must first master their own view of themselves. Simply stated, if you think of yourself as less than everyone else, humility will be an easy install into your day-to-day routine. If you tend to struggle with pride, thinking of yourself maybe more highly than you should, then this transition will be more difficult.

Focusing on serving is perhaps the best way to install humility. Letting someone ahead of you in line when you see they are in a hurry is an act of humility. Cleaning the bathroom of your office, even though you own the company, is an example of humility. The star of the basketball team could score a tremendous amount of baskets in any given game, but instead he takes lots of opportunities to pass the ball to his teammates so they can try to score as well. He is showing humility.

• Anne Hathaway turned in a strong performance in Les Miserables. In the movie, she sings a song called “I Dreamed A Dream.” This song is beautiful and is often sung to showcase a singer’s vocal talents. Rather than belt out the song in a way that would show how beautiful her voice is, Anne chose to sing it in as realistic a way as possible, which meant her voice did not sound as beautiful as it could. Singing it this way brought more believability to her character, even though it did not sound as beautiful as it could have.
• Even though Kate Middleton married into British royalty, she still likes to do her own grocery shopping and cooking.
• During a recent cross-country race in North Dakota, a runner carried an injured competitor across the finish line. Danielle LaNoue injured her patella only a few feet from the finish. Melanie Bailey encountered the fallen runner and stopped, though others ran past. Though she gave up her chance of winning the race, she helped the stranger across the finish line, and the two finished together. Now, they have become friends and constantly exchange Facebook messages.

When I read the stories of these people, I was, quite honestly, amazed. Anne Hathaway has a beautiful voice and yet she chose to show emotion over talent. Kate Middleton is a princess, for goodness sakes! If I was a princess, I think I'd probably have people do my shopping and cooking. So I could do more writing, of course.

I wish I was a princess.

Anyway, I was most impressed with the story of Danielle and Melanie. I'm sure that Melanie isn't the first runner to help a hurt competitor, and I'm sure that she won't be the last. But those stories always get me because they're real. They are real people - in this case, teenagers - defying the norm and going outside of their comfort zone to help others. I love that. I am inspired by these stories, especially when the people involved are young people. They don't fit the mold of the rebellious teen, the wild and careless. They care, and they show it. And they are a great example to follow if humility is something you struggle with.

Sometimes caring for others is not difficult. I like to babysit my cousins. They are fun to be around and I like to help my aunts out once in a while. I like to cook dinner for my family. These are times when caring comes easy. But what about the stranger, the homeless man you pass every day on your way to work? Maybe he makes you uncomfortable. Maybe you don't think he is safe. Still, buying him lunch, sitting and eating it with him would be an example of humility on your part. You can give up your pride and still be able to retain your dignity. Sometimes it's hard. But it's always the right choice.

C.S. Lewis put it this way: "Humility is not thinking less of yourself, but thinking of yourself less."  

So I hope you install humility into your daily routine. I hope you make it a habit. And I hope that you can use it as a tool to change the world around you.

 

Blessings until next time!

 

 

 

I Hope You Take a Stand

This past Sunday was Palm Sunday, the Sunday when pastors traditionally go over the events that took place a week before Jesus' death on the cross. The sermon usually goes something like this, "Jesus entered and this huge crowd went crazy with happiness and worship over his coming, and then later the same crowd turned on him and became a roaring crowd of hypocrites screaming for his murder." Am I right? And, yeah, that's technically what happened.

My pastor was no exception - he did preach about the Triumphal Entry on Palm Sunday. However, he did it in a way that I've never heard it done before, and in a way that resonated with me as a reminder of something really important. He talked about how Jesus sometimes asks us to do something completely crazy without giving us the full picture of what He has in mind, the way the disciples were asked to go and take a donkey without knowing why. I thought that this was such a unique way of keeping the tradition of preaching on the Triumphal Entry that I decided to write about it here.

The story of the Triumphal Entry is found, among other places, in Matthew 21. As I mentioned before, Jesus had asked the disciples to go and get him a donkey. He wanted them to just take it from the stable. If anyone thought that was strange, the disciples were to tell them that, "The Lord has need of it," and no questions would be asked.

Sometimes Jesus asks us to do things that don't make any sense, expecting us to do them anyway. He has a bigger plan and often, he chooses not to reveal it. Sometimes these things seem completely crazy. This is a hard truth because we have a "need" to understand all the factors before we invest in a course of action. I know that I'm that way, and I think that everyone is, to some extent. Some people would just get on a plane and wait to see where it would take them, but they wouldn't get on a plane without packing or without a passport. Even the most adventurous tends to take some kind of precaution. When something like this is asked of you, it is the ultimate "leap of faith". Jesus asks you to trust him and wait and see what happens, because He does have a plan. But following God fully oftentimes takes real guts. Many times we do not want to do what He wants us to.

That isn't to say that every time you have the urge to do something crazy, Jesus is leading you. Sometimes, the crazy is just that: crazy. He might lead you to dive off a bridge to save someone's life, but I highly doubt he would call you to just jump off a bridge. Taking a leap of faith is different from doing random things on a whim. Knowing whether or not Jesus is leading you takes careful consideration and prayer before action is taken, even if the outcome of that action is obvious, which it rarely is.

I believe that sometimes, though, the path that Jesus wants you to take is obvious even if you don't know where it leads. We should take a stand for Jesus, like the people who shouted and laid their coats down for Jesus (Matt. 21: 8-9). Sometimes this is something that you don't want to do. I probably wouldn't want to put my coat down for some dirty donkey's hooves to trod all over. My coat is nice. I want to keep it that way. But if Jesus were coming to my hometown and I wanted to honor him, I might have to ignore my feeling for my jacket and lay it before him.

My friends might think it was strange, me letting my favorite fleece get all muddy under someone's feet, but I shouldn't let that bother me. You can't let what other people think deter you from doing what you know you should. Taking a stand for Christ is always the right decision. Most likely you will be targeted. Jesus had already made some powerful enemies, and the crowd's reaction to His entry into Jerusalem had them riled up, to put it mildly (Matt. 21: 14-17). You will probably make enemies as well. Even if they aren't intent on killing you, they might make your life miserable and you just have to let them, because the absolute worst thing you could do is back down. Jesus says that he will acknowledge us in heaven if we acknowledge Him on earth, which also gives the impression that the reverse is true - when we get to heaven, Jesus won't recognize us if we haven't acknowledged him while we were still on the earth. "Therefore everyone who confesses Me before men, I will also confess him before My Father who is in heaven. But whoever denies Me before men, I will also deny him before My Father who is in heaven (Matthew 10:32-33)." God is so much more powerful than the people on earth who can hurt us or make our lives uncomfortable for a while. 

We need to do something crazy. 

We need to take a stand. 

I was so interested in this concept that I did a little bit of research, and a found multiple stories of people who recently stood up for their faith in the judgmental culture that we live in today. One of these really stuck with me, and that was the story of Megan and Mandy, twins who's graduation ceremony sparked a lawsuit, and a revival.

Megan and Mandy were graduating that weekend, and Megan had been selected to say a prayer during the ceremony. The morning that the ceremony was to take place, a federal judge issued an order that barred Russell County High School and Megan (cited in the order by name) from conducting the prayer during commencement. Megan faced a terrible decision - one that could change the outcome of her entire life. Three hours before the graduation ceremony, Megan received a phone call from Matt Staver of Liberty Counsel, an organization devoted to protecting religious freedom. They told her that they would be behind her every step of the way, and that God can turn our troubles into amazing opportunities (Harris, Brett and Alex). 

"Only a few hours later more than 3,000 people packed into the Russell County High gymnasium to watch 200 seniors graduate. As the principal finished his opening remarks the senior class suddenly stood as one body and began to recite The Lord’s Prayer!

Before they could finish the audience erupted into thunderous applause. Some students were too overcome with emotion to finish. But the statement had been made. They would not bow down to the ACLU (Harris, Brett and Alex)."

Then, Megan stepped up to the podium, prepared to give a speech based on the secular poem The Road Less Traveled. However, she felt that God wanted her to say something else. "You did not put me here to recite a poem, Lord."  She prayed for guidance and for the right words to say, and that night she gave her personal testimony and spoke of the peace that comes when you give your life to Jesus. Over and over and over, the speech was interrupted with applause by the very receptive audience. The next morning, Fox News called Megan, and that night, she repeated her testimony on the air, in front of millions of viewers (Harris, Brett and Alex).

 "That same afternoon, Mat Staver spoke with Dr. Jerry Falwell, Founder and then Chancellor of Liberty University, and was authorized to offer Megan full scholarship to join the 2006 freshman class. Upon hearing the good news, Megan was overcome with tearful amazement.

 'Are you kidding?' she asked. 'I’ve been praying for several years to be able to attend Liberty University, but I simply could not afford it.' But to Mr. Staver’s bewilderment, Megan did not immediately accept the offer. He was puzzled. 

Mr. Staver called her a few days later and voice that sounded just like Megan answered the phone. 'Megan?' he asked.

'No, this is Mandy, her twin sister,' the voice replied.

Mandy, he found out, was the one who orchestrated the recitation of The Lord’s Prayer — distributing bookmarks with a copy of the prayer on it in case anyone forgot the words (see the bookmarks in this post’s header).

Mr. Staver immediately called Dr. Falwell. 'Guess what,' he said. 'Megan has a twin sister!'   

Dr. Falwell paused briefly, and offered Mandy a full scholarship as well! The twin sisters, who had been planning to attend University of the Cumberlands together, now had an open door to their first choice — Liberty University! (Harris, Brett and Alex)."

Mandy and Megan were both able to receive a wonderful opportunity from their first choice college, not to mention the amazing testimony that they both had, and all because Megan was able to stand up for what she believed in. I'm sure she was afraid. I'm sure she thought that what she as going to do was crazy. I'm sure she was not comfortable, and I'm sure she made a few enemies. But God worked wonders in her life, and she was able to watch as a miracle happened. At the beginning, when she was deciding what she should do, she had no way of knowing how much would come from her decision to follow God (Harris, Brett and Alex).

This story is inspiring in so many ways. It is an amazing story of miraculous courage, and Christian students and teachers, bosses and workers, mothers and daughters and sons and fathers, can all take away the encouragement that God is still working in this country today. Sometimes He calls us to do crazy things. Maybe He is calling you to speak up when that teacher says something you disagree with, even though you could get detention. Maybe He is calling you to gently talk to that family member who is struggling with some sin, even though they might lose respect for you. Maybe He is calling you to go on that trip, to minister to those people, even though it is so far away.

Maybe He is calling you.


WORKS CITED:

Harris, Alex, and Brett Harris. "Megan and Mandy: Taking a Stand for Christ." Web log post. The Rebelution. 
N.p., 11 July 2008. Web. 21 Mar. 2016.           

I Hope You Can See Hope

Hi! Ready for another round of ramblings?

So it's getting to be my favorite time of year again: Easter is once again creeping upon us. I know it's a little early yet to be thinking about it, but, as I mentioned, it's my favorite time of year and I just couldn't wait any longer to write about it.

Easter is my favorite holiday, even more than Christmas or Thanksgiving. I like it because my family gets together, I like it because I get to dress up, I like it because I get to see my friends. But I love it because it is a yearly reminder of what Jesus Christ did for us, and that is cause for somber reflection, yes; but also praise and celebration.

So, I definitely think that Jesus is a hero who's story deserves to be told. And since that is one of the purposes of this blog, to share the inspiring stories of heroes, I think I'll do just that. Really quickly and briefly, here's some background in case you don't know, or maybe you just forgot:

Easter comes in three parts.

First: This dude Jesus - who happens to be the perfect, sinless son of the Creator God - leaves his paradise in Heaven and comes to earth. He spends thirty-three years among us humans, eating, drinking and talking with us. This in itself is huge. He also preaches and does miracles to convince us that he is, in fact, who he says he is, and that is God. He makes friends and feels emotions and connects with us so he can understand what we're going through.

Second: Jesus is brutally murdered. He's killed. He knew this was going to happen - in fact, it's the reason he came to the earth in the first place. Because we are sinners we needed a perfect sacrifice to compensate for our guilt. And we are guilty. A mob took him and he went with them, unprotestingly, and they beat him within an inch of his life. Finally, they crucified him. He was definitely dead and he chose to die for you, and for me.

Third: Jesus doesn't stay dead. He, in his infinite power and grace, rose from the dead; not like a zombie or a ghost but as a regular person. This is the reason we celebrate Easter. If Jesus had not risen from the dead, we would not be able to partake of the gift that God can now offer us: eternal life with him -  if we believe this true story and follow God's leading.

(If you want to know more about this awesome true story of good overcoming evil, the epitome of hope, take a look at the gospel of John in the Bible.)

This is what I believe with my whole heart. I know that it isn't necessarily popular and I am not trying to preach, only to share information and truth for others to make a decision of their own. The thing is, if I've chosen wrong, I've only wasted my life. If someone chooses something else, and they chose wrong...well, they've wasted their eternity.

So, I wanted to share something that I think is really interesting about the story of Jesus's resurrection that was shared with me by one of my best friends. John 20:15-16 is the story of Jesus first appearing after this miracle, to Mary Magdalene. It says this: " He asked her, 'Woman, why are you crying? Who is it you are looking for?' Thinking he was the gardener, she said, 'Sir, if you have carried him away, tell me where you have put him, and I will get him.' Jesus said to her, 'Mary.' She turned toward him and cried out in Aramaic, 'Rabboni!' (which means “Teacher”)."



He even spoke to her and she remained unaware.

Mary was grieving tremendously. Her hope for the future of mankind had just died, this man that she had spent the past (about) three years worshipping and learning from and loving. She was so caught up in her distress that she failed to notice the presence of her Teacher, her Lord. Her God. Jesus was standing right behind her. He even spoke to her and she remained unaware. 
Similarly, I think that we can get so caught up in our own troubles that we don't notice Jesus. We cry out for him, stumbling blindly in our darkness and ignorance, not realizing that Jesus is right there, waiting for us to notice, ready to catch us if we fall. He's got our back. But we concentrate on our troubles even as we pray for guidance, and we don't feel him there. And then you just want to give up, because how can you do it on your own?

Well, you can't.

But Jesus is holding onto you, even if you aren't holding onto him.

As soon as you search for him, he will make himself known to you. He has a way of popping back up, if only you know where to look. He is reflected in the natural world all around us. Little things, anything from the lyrics to a song that just won't get out of your head, to a shooting star that touches your heart just right. Jesus can show himself in many ways as long as you are looking. But most of all, he shows himself in the actions of his followers. That is why I share stories of people performing good deeds. Even if those people aren't Christians, their actions can inspire Christians to do the same for our Jesus. It brings glory to God. And it helps people who are searching for Jesus to be able to find him. That could be an unbeliever, or it could be a Christian who has "fallen away" (for lack of a better term) and has all but given up. We have the opportunity to show others hope, to be lights to even the darkest of hearts.

And this just by our actions and our words. If we keep our eyes open, and know what to look for, we will be encouraged by the knowledge that Jesus is right there, right behind us. If we keep our eyes open, we'll recognize him. And if we believe in him, he will never leave us. Hebrews 13:5-6 says that "he has said, “' will never leave you nor forsake you.' So we can confidently say, 'The Lord is my helper; I will not fear; what can man do to me?'" 

This Easter, I hope you can see the hope: the Hope for all people. I hope you have a wonderful holiday, and that you will touch others lives with something you say or do. I hope you never take for granted the kindnesses of others because they are how God shows himself in our world.     

I Hope You Take Time To Give Credit

"Yeah. I'm so wise. I'm a regular Gandalf."

So, my cousin practically begged me to write another post. Apparently, she's bored without my words of wisdom.

:)

Yeah. I'm so wise. I'm a regular Gandalf.

Be that as it may, today I'd like to write this post for my mother specifically, and all the other people in my life who take time out of their very busy lives to spend time with me and help me. They, among others, have passed along the wisdom that I so clumsily attempt to repeat here.

Some background: A few months ago I got the opportunity to attend classes over the summer at a prestigious university. I've been really excited about it, but I put off writing the personal statement until the day it was due because I can't talk about myself. I mean, I can, but I don't like to make myself look good. I finished my statement around ten last night and my mom was going to mail the package with all the information today after work.

However.

Today, my mom was wicked sick. I mean, the "lie-around-in-bed-until-you-throw-up-and-then-lie-around-some-more" kind of sick. (Sorry if that was embarrassing, Mom...) I was sick, too, and neither of us felt like doing much of anything. But my mom, my awesome amazing mom, still got out of bed and went to the post office and mailed that package for me so I might have a chance at this exciting opportunity.

Remember what I said about love and actions? That's it!

People do things like this all the time without getting credit, so I'm giving my mom some. She works long hours all the time, and she still finds time to spend time with us (meaning, my sisters and I) and do things for us, like helping us with our homework or planning a sleepover. I think that she doesn't get thanked enough. We take these small actions of love for granted until she's forced to ask for credit: "Sophie, I did the dishes for you. Didn't you notice? Aren't you glad?"

Little acts of kindness deserve more credit, even if, perhaps, the person doing them doesn't expect it. Take a moment and say "Thank You." Write a thank-you note. Send a thank-you text. Did someone talk with you for hours after your breakup? Thank you, Kenzie. Does someone drive you to your violin lesson every week? Thanks, Grandma. Did someone plan a party for you and your cousins, even though they have crazy lives as well? Thank you, Auntie Bee and Auntie Jennie. "In all things, give thanks, for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you." (1 Thessalonians 5:18).

The concept of gratitude is lost on this generation. We expect things. We assume that we deserve the acts of kindness and so we neglect to give thanks to those who've earned it.

"Why should she talk with me for hours after my breakup? Well, she's my best friend! She's obligated to do that! It's in her job description! Who cares if she's on vacation? I'm more important!"

What?

"Of course they should plan a party for us! We're awesome! We deserve a party!"

Seriously?

"She's my mom! She has to mail my packages. She has to take care of my responsibilities. She's sick? So what? What is that compared to the chance to go to a great college in a different country this summer!"

Say it isn't so.

We are steeped in a culture of selfishness, and I would just like to point this out to those who aren't aware.

Look back at those examples: "She's MY best friend!" "I'M more important!" "We're AWESOME!" "We DESERVE..." "She's MY mom!" "It's MY chance." Maybe those were a little ridiculous. I mean, no one talks like that, right?

I wouldn't be so sure. We may not actually voice that kind of thought process, but it is ingrained in the media, and it is a part of our sin nature that is especially hard to combat. Even if you don't say it, even if you don't consciously think it, at least once or twice you've acted in such a way that proves you expect to be waited on. I'm guilty of this. I think we're all guilty of this. But I'm not necessarily trying to make you feel guilty. All I'm saying is that this is a problem today, and it's one that I think we can attempt to fix. After all, knowing that the problem exists is the first step to solving it!

The next step would be intentionally noticing the kindnesses of others.

The third step would be a "Thank You" directed towards those kindnesses.

Even if this is just thanking that guy for scooting over at the movies so you and your buddies can sit together. Even if this is just thanking the grocery store checkout lady. Even if this is just thanking God for keeping you alive. They're steps in the right direction. And if you do this, people will notice. I said, "Thank you!" once to the guy who gives out the shoes at the bowling alley, and my friends were like, "Sophie, you're so nice!" I mean, it was just his job, but it's refreshing for others to see a kindness returned for their own. It's something relatively easy to do that will shine a light in this world. So, I hope you remember to take the time to give credit to others who do things for you, even if it's only something small; but especially if it's something big.

"I can no other answer make but thanks and thanks and ever thanks." ~ William Shakespeare, Twelfth Night, Act III, Scene III  




 

I Hope You Find Somebody to Love

Hi again. It's me.

First things first: I decided not to make my January post a two-parter because I still couldn't come up with anything that I liked. That wasn't posted by my mom. You know? So Part Two will just have to go down in the catacombs of Sophie's blog history as a post as dead and boring as January itself.

Fitting.

Anyway, February is finally here. Or it will be, in a couple of days. I love February. It's short, and the less time you have to suffer through winter, the better. After February comes March, and after March comes April, and hopefully by then, spring buds will be blooming. And, of course, February is THE month for romantics like me!

Although my Valentine's Day looks like this:



:(. Oh, well. There's nothing wrong with that.

Valentine's Day is the thing in February, mostly because card companies and restaurants feel the need to elicit money from love-struck (or not) couples and high schools feel the need to encourage teenage romance with heart-themed dances. That said, I am in favor of the holiday. Of course I am. It's a holiday dedicated to love! And if you can't find it in you to tell your significant other that you love them on all of the other days of the year, you are pressured to on this day. Though I think you should feel that pressure all year round.

However, I don't think that Valentine's Day should only be about sharing love with your boyfriend/girlfriend/fiancé/spouse. There are so many ways to show love to other people - your friends, your neighbors, your strangers. On Valentine's Day I would like to see someone celebrating another kind of love. The holiday is centered around romantic love, of course, but who says that it has to be that way? I think that people like this should be celebrated:

 

Love is defined by Dictionary.com as "an intense feeling of deep affection" or "a person or thing that one loves." By this definition, this modern world's definition, none of these people are showing love. The surfer isn't showing love to his friend by fulfilling his dream. The teenager isn't showing love by treating that little girl with respect and kindness. The child isn't showing love by befriending a blind boy. By this definition, "love" is a "feeling", an emotion, something fleeting and inconsequential that comes and goes between two people. This is the definition of love that Valentine's Day is built on.

I would argue that this definition of love is ridiculous.

Of course these people are showing love. They are showing real love, not a come-and-go emotion or urge that pop culture romanticizes into a completely unrealistic viewpoint. Love that you share with a lifetime partner is, naturally, different than the kind of love that these people are displaying; nevertheless, real, true love is not a noun for an emotion, but a verb, an action. Love is always shown by actions, whether that is a girl cooking a special Valentine's dinner for her man or a teenage boy teaching a tomboy to skateboard. Both are taking time out of their day to show another person that they matter. The desire to do these good works for others stems from an emotion, true, but the "loving" part isn't fulfilled until the works are. If others would describe you as a "loving person", it means they can tell that you treat others with the respect and honor they deserve as creatures made in God's image because you are obviously doing something about it. If you love your boyfriend, you take time out of your schedule to do something special for him. If you love your wife, you plan a date night when you know she will be able to enjoy it, even if it interferes with your schedule. If you love your family, you clean their nastiness out of the bathroom without being asked or hang your sister's laundry for her when she forgets it in the washing machine. If you love your best friend, you spend hours consoling her over the phone after her breakup, even though it interferes with your vacation time. Real love takes work. It takes action. Often, it takes sacrifice. But it is worth it, because you will create close relationships and those loved ones will, more often than not, return with kindnesses directed at you.

So even if you're single on Valentine's Day, you don't have to spend the night sulking with a spoon, a heavy blanket, a quart of Ben and Jerry's, and Allie and Noah from The Notebook. Instead, spend it thinking of things you could do to show the people you love that you love them.

I'll probably still have Ben and Jerry's, though.

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone! I love you all!

 

I Hope Your Resolution Means Something

This is a new year.

2016.

Pandemonium erupted.

We waited all night on December 30th, anxiously anticipating 12:01, January 1, when all of our "old year" problems would magically disappear and we'd turn the page to a new chapter, a new year. And when that little zero finally flipped to a one, pandemonium erupted. Kisses. Embraces. Glowing spheres fell. For that one moment, everything was perfect.

And then that moment ended.

What makes us so excited for the new year? It feels the same as the old one, doesn't it? All of those New Years greetings feel a little cliché to me: "May every day of the new year glow with good cheer!" Get that cheesy grin off your face and step into the real world, please. I guess that goodness is what we want, what we hope for; but our resolutions die, our excitement dies within the month. By February all of our "Exercise more"'s and "Eat healthy"'s have faded into the every day doldrums again.

Sorry. I'm shooting down other people's hope.

But I'm not, really. Because even though this is going to happen, even though we're bound to lose steam after a while, there has to be some kind of resolution that we can keep. Something that isn't an "Exercise more" or "Eat healthy". Something that means something.

Why do people do "New Years Resolutions", anyway? So they can feel better about themselves? So they can fulfill the tradition? Or so they can legitimately work on improving themselves? That isn't hope, not really. These silly little lists don't restore faith in humanity because nobody ever sticks to them. They don't mean anything. And you can't say, "My New Year's Resolution is to make a resolution that means something!"

Come on.

So how do we change this? The non-fulfillment of the resolutions is almost as much a part of the tradition as making the list in the first place. We want to make resolutions that are meaningful but not cheesy, hopeful but not unrealistic. Maybe I'm placing the bar too high because I can't think of anything that exactly fits that description.

I think it'd be awesome if somebody could come up with something like that. I've done a ton of research and I haven't been able to come up with anyone who could fit my standards. The resolutions are made but never followed through. HOWEVER: if you have a story about an AWESOME resolution that you KEPT from any year prior to 2016 (obviously), email me at rsophie865@gmail .com or talk about it in the comments below, and I'll write about it in my next post!

I hope you all find some "meaningful" resolution to do that will eventually become a habit! Happy New Year! Go do something!